Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Just Whatever.

My oldest, that sounds so grown up, to use the word old in describing her. But that is what she is, Older than Jade. Even if she is only four. And it turns out she's growing up. She just had her first door slamming tantrum. It started with instructions from me to go upstairs and play in the play room. Yes I did say Play. She didn't like that so much. The main floor is such a great place to torque around and make a lot of noise especially when mom is on the phone with the phone services company.

When I got off the phone I needed to send her up even though I was done. She still didn't like the idea. So I gave her a little bit of incentive. Turns out that just made her angry. She ran up all tears and hair streaming out behind her, defiance emblazoned all across her back, and threw herself on her bed. She lay crying into her pillow with the forcefulness of a fake cry and when that didn't get me up there to console her she stomped across the room to slam the door and stomped back to her bed to cry with more force. The kind that does not contain water, no tears, just anger.

My first instinct was to go up and talk it out. But then something struck me. That is what she wants. She wants me to confront her. She want's to control how I react to her. Instead I left her. Gave her some space. Let her process the whole thing on her own.

Is it okay for the tantrum? No, we are not fans of acting out in frustration, we understand frustration but we must learn to control it (yes even I must learn, that's why I chose not to go up). When we talked about it she knew what she had done wrong at the first and she will now learn that slamming doors is not acceptable behavior.

It was a shock to hear this deliberate act of rebellion. She purposefully slammed the door in anger to make a point. I had no clue the teenage years started at 4. Does that mean she will be through all the teenage angst by the age of 11? HA HA HA!! Don't worry I do not fool myself.

And here we are in the evening. The day progressing as per usual. She has her difficult moments as do we all and then, then comes the good stuff.

As we walked out into the open expanse of this small town after supper she looked up and noted the great stars that were over head. "oh Mom, look at all the bright stars. OH! one just fell out of the sky."

"really? Where do you think it went?"

"I think it fell out of the sky and came to the earth into one of these sparkles in the snow"

"Hmm. I like it, where did you get that idea from"

"I don't know, just whatever"

That's where it all comes from. In our hearts, in our heads, in our love. Just whatever. 

1 comment:

  1. I imagine it must be hard to raise kids and know how the react on their behaviour, but sounds you are doing a great job. Love the start story. Aren't children the cutest sometimes?


Thanks for stopping by. I would love to hear what your thoughts are on your New Life.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...