When Life throws you a disaster

You sit back and watch the picture unfold.


Tinker toys, these little sticks and bits are both a joy and a struggle for my control freak.

So some days I let me freak go and let these littles have at 'er. We will be finding these bits of wood through out our home for the next fifty years. And when the next new family moves in and renovates they will find them in the ducts and the floor joists. They will wonder at what the little girls were like who lived here some fifty years past. And if we do right by this house their giggles will vibrate through the wood of this old structure and feed into the joy of the next family that finds delight in an old home.


Oh that I would let go of the control I want so badly to have over my situation and just enjoy what comes my way more often. For when I release my desire to take it and make it what I think it needs to be it turns into something much more beautiful than I could have made it.


These two have an ability to play so well together. On the days when they can't seem to get it together I wonder what I have done wrong. And then there are days like awhile back. Paul had told me that the computer that Suzie uses to play her games on was all hooked up. So when Suzie asked to play her games I thought it would be a simple yes.
"Okay mom, I just need to move it over to here and then can I turn it on?"
Me: "Why would you need to move it?" and then I look over and see the bare back of a computer not hooked up.
I am not as efficient at putting all the right cords in all the right places and when it comes to some of the speaker and mouse cords I have no clue what all the symbols in the back mean. I fought for some time and got more frustrated as I went along not figuring it out. And as I am huffing and puffing in anger towards this stupid machine (cause you know the computer was totally at fault for not being plugged in) I heard this..
"Mom, should I pray for you?"
Me: "sure Suzie that would be great"
Suzie: "God, help mom to be able to not be frustrated and help her to have peace in her heart"

You know It worked, I was calm. She hit the nail on the head with that simple prayer. I decided in that moment that maybe I should calm down a bit. Take it as it comes. And with the elimination process got the speakers working and sent her on her way.


In a moment like that I realize that the simple things I pray for her are calming to her easily anxious heart. And that in the moments that I am not really trying to form her and change her, it is in those places that her heart is formed.

: :


When you stand a Bean on the counter to take it's picture this is what you get.






And when you set a Bean on the counter to take it's picture......


Then the Bonkers wants in on the fun.


And suddenly you see that you no longer have two toddlers but only one and a little girl.


All growing up and four at the end of the month. Where has the time gone and how much faster will the next four years go? Double this time up and we will have an eight year old. That is not possible. I love this girl and the heart that she holds within her. Oh that I would be a worthy guide, along with her father, to set her on her way to what is in store for her. That we might help her to find the tools she will need to become the beautiful woman that she is most definitely going to become. We Love you our dear Suzie Bonkers. You are beautiful now and continue to become more so every day.