"Mommy, you are so pretty"

I was looking back on some posts from way back when my girls were younger. I sure shared a lot of our every day lives. I love seeing what we were doing on just any old day when they were babies and toddlers. Now it seems I have forgotten to talk about our every day happenings.

Today I was changing from just a regular house skirt to one I don't mind being seen in. I had a student coming soon and wanted to look a little less like a shlub. Of course the girls had to study all my jewelery while I was doing that. First Suzie suggested a pair of earings. "I think you should wear these rainbow ones mom." "Oh yea?" "yeah they are pretty.... oh and this necklace,...... no this one.. It's pretty." "Oh okay" Then Jades voice pipes in, "oh and mommy wear that bracelet." "This one?" "yeah." So I was all dressed up for the day. As the girls leave the room I hear Jades little voice saying "oh mommy, you are so pretty mommy... You look like you are going to a Ballet"



"Mommy is so pretty." Awe thanks girls. I looked like a mom who had just finished a work out and had a quick shower. Then threw on some simple clothes and a bit of a mix of miss matched jewelery. But I felt like a queen. I thought I would take a picture to share with others but when I looked at the out come I looked just like I described above. Nothing stunning. Not my best, But the girls thought I was lovely. So I kept it for myself (my look) and enjoyed this little gift of love from my girls.


(These two photos are from a different day. I was playing around with long exposures on a dark night.)

Little Lady Quotes

Lately Suzie is full of some great quotes. Let's start with supper.


After a meal she often will tell me that her tummy rumbles.

Suzie: "Mom, my tummy rumbled."
Me: "Oh yeah."
Suzie: "yeah I think it rumbled cause it's just organizin' the the food I put in there"


Sitting at the supper table before the meal has started she hears me say that it is ready, time to eat. She has been chattering away the whole past hour.

Suzie: "Dad supper time"
Dad: ........
Suzie: "Dad it's time to eat"
Dad: ........
Me: "Paul it's time to eat"
Dad: "ah, okay I'll be right there"
Suzie: "Mom I already told him"
Me: "Yeah I know sweety but sometimes dad has heard so much of your talking, cause you talk all the time, that he can't even hear you after a while."
Suzie: "Yeah, Sometimes my Talking gets tired of my talking and I need a drink, can I have a drink of water? My talking is getting tired of my talking." drinks water, "Ah, that's better, now my talking feels better."


A Jade Bean quote is still a little harder to come by at this point. But the fun thing is there are words coming. Right now they are copying words. Just now Suzie calls out and says
"Mom, Jades getting into trouble."
Jade comes walking over to me, "tubow,... tubow,.... tubow"


Awhile back we were having a bit of a rough morning and Suzie had been crying very hard for quite sometime. I really was sorry she was having such a rough go of it and asked if she would be okay. Between sobs of great sorrow she cries "Mom, I don't think...... I will be happy........ till Summer!" Thankfully we didn't have to wait that long to see her sweet smile again.


Oh my sweet Suzie. You are an amazing little girl with more emotions than the average bear but I love you desperately. The other day, after Suzie had a really major melt down one minute and was laughing like the silly goose she is the next. Paul was kind of amazed, again, at how she can go from the "End of the world to all is a rainbow" in a split second. I told him that people like her are an amazing gift. It may be hard to understand the high emotion but her little heart, when given the opportunity and guided well can be full of compassion. She will laugh with those who laugh and cry with those in sorrow. Her heart will know fully what it is to love and laugh, to sorrow and ache. Life so full of emotion can be hard but she will learn that it can be a blessing.

Just now,
Me: "Suzie, I like you"
Suzie: "Thanks mom for giving me my Jader Bean out of your Belly"
No matter how much they bother each other it is all redeemed in the moments when they love each other. I saw Jade reach out and put her arms around Suzie's waist the other day. Suzie thought that Jade was trying to bother her but I knew different. Jade Loves her big sister and wants to be just like her.


Each day we pray that we can do the best that we can to help them know these things. We pray that we can guide their little hearts in the ways they should go. Our little ladies are so different from each other and from others that we know. It is our Suzie and Jade that we are raising, no other child in the world is the same as these two.

Just Whatever.

My oldest, that sounds so grown up, to use the word old in describing her. But that is what she is, Older than Jade. Even if she is only four. And it turns out she's growing up. She just had her first door slamming tantrum. It started with instructions from me to go upstairs and play in the play room. Yes I did say Play. She didn't like that so much. The main floor is such a great place to torque around and make a lot of noise especially when mom is on the phone with the phone services company.

When I got off the phone I needed to send her up even though I was done. She still didn't like the idea. So I gave her a little bit of incentive. Turns out that just made her angry. She ran up all tears and hair streaming out behind her, defiance emblazoned all across her back, and threw herself on her bed. She lay crying into her pillow with the forcefulness of a fake cry and when that didn't get me up there to console her she stomped across the room to slam the door and stomped back to her bed to cry with more force. The kind that does not contain water, no tears, just anger.



My first instinct was to go up and talk it out. But then something struck me. That is what she wants. She wants me to confront her. She want's to control how I react to her. Instead I left her. Gave her some space. Let her process the whole thing on her own.



Is it okay for the tantrum? No, we are not fans of acting out in frustration, we understand frustration but we must learn to control it (yes even I must learn, that's why I chose not to go up). When we talked about it she knew what she had done wrong at the first and she will now learn that slamming doors is not acceptable behavior.



It was a shock to hear this deliberate act of rebellion. She purposefully slammed the door in anger to make a point. I had no clue the teenage years started at 4. Does that mean she will be through all the teenage angst by the age of 11? HA HA HA!! Don't worry I do not fool myself.



And here we are in the evening. The day progressing as per usual. She has her difficult moments as do we all and then, then comes the good stuff.



As we walked out into the open expanse of this small town after supper she looked up and noted the great stars that were over head. "oh Mom, look at all the bright stars. OH! one just fell out of the sky."



"really? Where do you think it went?"

"I think it fell out of the sky and came to the earth into one of these sparkles in the snow"

"Hmm. I like it, where did you get that idea from"

"I don't know, just whatever"

That's where it all comes from. In our hearts, in our heads, in our love. Just whatever. 

When Life throws you a disaster

You sit back and watch the picture unfold.


Tinker toys, these little sticks and bits are both a joy and a struggle for my control freak.

So some days I let me freak go and let these littles have at 'er. We will be finding these bits of wood through out our home for the next fifty years. And when the next new family moves in and renovates they will find them in the ducts and the floor joists. They will wonder at what the little girls were like who lived here some fifty years past. And if we do right by this house their giggles will vibrate through the wood of this old structure and feed into the joy of the next family that finds delight in an old home.


Oh that I would let go of the control I want so badly to have over my situation and just enjoy what comes my way more often. For when I release my desire to take it and make it what I think it needs to be it turns into something much more beautiful than I could have made it.


These two have an ability to play so well together. On the days when they can't seem to get it together I wonder what I have done wrong. And then there are days like awhile back. Paul had told me that the computer that Suzie uses to play her games on was all hooked up. So when Suzie asked to play her games I thought it would be a simple yes.
"Okay mom, I just need to move it over to here and then can I turn it on?"
Me: "Why would you need to move it?" and then I look over and see the bare back of a computer not hooked up.
I am not as efficient at putting all the right cords in all the right places and when it comes to some of the speaker and mouse cords I have no clue what all the symbols in the back mean. I fought for some time and got more frustrated as I went along not figuring it out. And as I am huffing and puffing in anger towards this stupid machine (cause you know the computer was totally at fault for not being plugged in) I heard this..
"Mom, should I pray for you?"
Me: "sure Suzie that would be great"
Suzie: "God, help mom to be able to not be frustrated and help her to have peace in her heart"

You know It worked, I was calm. She hit the nail on the head with that simple prayer. I decided in that moment that maybe I should calm down a bit. Take it as it comes. And with the elimination process got the speakers working and sent her on her way.


In a moment like that I realize that the simple things I pray for her are calming to her easily anxious heart. And that in the moments that I am not really trying to form her and change her, it is in those places that her heart is formed.

: :


When you stand a Bean on the counter to take it's picture this is what you get.






And when you set a Bean on the counter to take it's picture......


Then the Bonkers wants in on the fun.


And suddenly you see that you no longer have two toddlers but only one and a little girl.


All growing up and four at the end of the month. Where has the time gone and how much faster will the next four years go? Double this time up and we will have an eight year old. That is not possible. I love this girl and the heart that she holds within her. Oh that I would be a worthy guide, along with her father, to set her on her way to what is in store for her. That we might help her to find the tools she will need to become the beautiful woman that she is most definitely going to become. We Love you our dear Suzie Bonkers. You are beautiful now and continue to become more so every day.

Oh the joys of the season

No this is not a "holiday" post. And no I am not talking about Fall. This has nothing to do with the weather or time of year. I am talking about a season in our lives. It is short and long all in one. The thing that makes it seem short is the fact that once you have been in it for awhile you get used to it. It just becomes the new normal.

What season am I referring too? Here let me show you a few pics. This first one gives you an idea of the constant motion involved.

Put them on. Fight to keep them there. Wait. Encourage. Wait some more. Cheer. Wait.....


Watch every move. Listen to every "word". No she does not really speak so to say but a mom can understand that "pauy" means potty.

A mom also recognizes the look of shock and the glance down of a baby. Like they just don't understand why suddenly their legs are wet.


This season involves a lot of baking soda powdered carpets. Rags and panties, pants and socks washed in the laundry every day.

And you know you are in this season the second time around when you are asking the older sister to tell you any time the younger one farts. Yup, every move, every sound, you want to know about it all.

But in the end it only takes three days for them to know where it is supposed to go. Does it always get there? Absolutely not. In fact now that she knows where it belongs she trails it to the bathroom vs. standing in the puddle. So now instead of one spot to clean you have a whole piddle trail to follow. But it's a good sign you tell yourself, "she knows what is supposed to be happening, she knows where it belongs".

But there is good news in every victory and even in a lot of the "failings". The good news? We have started this and there is not going back. She gets it and so the end is now in sight. The true and final end may be a few months off and there may even be some trouble a year down the road but we're on that road and this is good.

We have had a few outings in the under pants. It makes me nervous but it becomes normal. So each time we leave the house is another chance for us to learn.

To learn that yes we do still need to bring a second set of clothes. No we do not have this completely beat
yet and don't trust her when she gives a negative to the question "do you need to go potty?" Oh yeah. That is a question that leaves my lips about 50 times a day. No, probably more.


(look at her in those skinny jeans. I am going to have to pull out the nine month old clothes again, no diaper means smaller waist)

Another outing...
This is how we get water.

The jug rides in the stroller and I carry Jade on my back




This beautiful girl is such a help. And she is so proud of her little sister. "Oh Jade you peed in the potty. Good job my sister!!"


Love her laugh. A few days back she had me laughing so hard I was leaning on the counter with tears rolling down my cheeks. When the moment had passed and she again tried the "joke" for the fourth time, it had lost it's charm. She wanted so badly to have me laughing again. "Mom, how do we go back there?"
"Oh dear girl, the joke is old, It is only funny a few times and then the moment passes"

"Why does it get old?"

"Well when you say the same joke to many times it becomes predictable"

"But I want to go back to there. I like laughing with you"

"Me too, Suzie Bonkers, me too"
Oh the things we have to learn as we grow up. The concept of something being over done is completely lost on my little girl. I do so wish I was still a child at times so that the same silly little joke would be funny forever.



We have now completed day five and are into the fifth night. The last two nights she has kept her diaper dry with one potty break in the night. This little lady is doing great at this new season of her life. My babies are growing up.

Thanks all for your encouragement over the last few days. It is so good to have friends to talk to that remind me that this is indeed only a season. That I have been here once before with the ups and downs and that in the end it will all pass and I will forget about the "gory" details faster than I can blink an eye.

May you have close friends who you can lean on in the moments you think will last forever. Those days when it seems that only messes surround you and there is no hope. And may you settle into the season you are in knowing that as you work through it this time will pass and we will move into the next season with anticipation and excitement. That each new/replayed challenge is actually a gift even if only in disguise. It will only make us stronger. Yes, even potty training a toddler will strengthen our spirits if we let it.

Inspired #15: The season to preserve

Suzie on seeing the small portion of clothes I managed to fold before diving into a vat full of tomatoes.

"Oh Good Job Mom. Good job on folding the laundry"

Suzie on seeing the laundry basket still nearly as full as it started.

"Oh, mom I think you need to just fold this laundry now"


This is my life. All my laundry baskets hold clean, not folded laundry. One of them holds summer clothes that need to be packed away but these are things I cannot seem to get at. In fact I feel that I am in a constant state of Behind. But this is not news to you. So instead of going on about how full life is with the "things that need to be done" Let's just pause for a minute and look at some fun things that inspire me with what is first on the list.

Putting food away for the winter.

1: I love jars and I love to store stuff in jars. Is this just not the cutest little thing ever
2: Okay fine, That last one can't be the cutest cause this one is blue
3: Fine Green, Yeesh, How am I to decide with all these great choices?
4: And these labels? Well you just know that these are a must when canning. These are stunning!!
5: I love these little baskets. I had no idea these even excisted and I am in LOVE
6: For the chokecherry syrup I wanted to make this year but then there were no berries. Next year
7: And this might not be something that can be used for canning but I think it would hold table butter nicely
8: Here's another green jar. That label just makes it all the more amazing.
9: Finely this canning pot. The lack of one of these in my life is why this year I am freezing my tomatoes.

Okay fine I don't lack the pot I lack the wire rack for inside and the guts to just do the boiling caner process. Everyone that hears me say that goes on to tell me how easy it is but I have only been canning for a few years now and I just have not yet gotten my nerve up. I will. I promise, one day I will boil all my cans and be a pro. But for now it is one step at a time. So yesterday I froze my tomatoes for this year.

Suzie is sitting next to me watching National Geographic kids animal videos. It is very distracting and I can't seem to focus on finishing up this post so I am going to leave you with that and hope you have a great rest of the week. And I think I might just head down stairs to sew. Have a lovely day.

Random times for random people

 After strapping a plastic cross stitch board on her back Suzie goes on to tell me what is happening.


"Mom I'm wearin a shield"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah I'm bein Goliath"

"Oh really, so your the bad guy?"

"No, I'm a good Goliath. I'm a girl so I can only be a good guy"

Well that came out of no where. Most often she is the bad guy cause she doesn't know any of the good guy character names.



Speaking of coming out of no where that is what this post is full of. Times long past and in fact I feel as though these should have been up on the blog long ago. But "I'm a girl so I can be random and way behind". So here goes nothing 


My folks came out for a working visit a few weeks back now. Or more, I can't even keep my days straight let alone the weeks. Did you know that today is October first? Yeah, crazy right? Well us Canadians have it even more crazy than that Next Sunday is Thanksgiving! Fall is taking me and sweeping my feet out from under me. It thinks it's funny to send my mind swirling like a bunch of orange and yellow leaves.

Just like Paul thought this would work really well for swinging Jade Bean all on her own.


Turns out it worked great. She had fun and Suzie joined in


Then of course she had to try the other direction. Yes she is wearing another skirt under her dress.


See, My mom. I'm not joking when I say they were here. If you follow my instagram feed you would have seen. Some days I find that it is easier to pull out my ipod than the ten pound weight. I just like the pictures that come from my ten pound weight a lot better.











It is a few hours later here. When it comes to writing out these posts they often take me all day if not more to make them all come together. I often wish to say some deep meaningful thing but wonder how I would make it flow smoothly when my brain feels foggy with the busy days. Jade seems to be working on some more teeth again so that makes her a clingy little thing.



But when it is this sweet pea that clings to my side I can handle that.


Playing a game of Kiss Grandma and then...


Run to kiss mom and back again.


Oh yeah, and My super great older brother came to work with my folks. My parents have some bits of property around these parts that needed some maintenance. This brother and his girls have lived in BC for the past, nearly five years, and are moving back out this way in a short little while. That will leave this small town holding four of us five kids in a very short distance of each other. Much fun to come!!!

Ah yes and somewhere in the last while I got to have four extra little kiddos here in my back yard. These are the kids of one of my many cousins and they are a joy to have around.





Here There is only one of them as the other three are off playing. (my goodness that was earlier this month and the yard looks nothing like that now. All is orange and dead with the trees coming bare as quick as the wind can remove their leaves.)




And so life goes on. My man and I are feeling the crunch coming on for the project that we have constantly on our minds. And so each evening we are working on it or on the things of the home that get left undone when we are at 152 North Railway. Soon we shall name it and no longer just call it "The Project".

Till then life is good even when full to the brim with crazy. Soon I will have my mind all organized and sitting just so. But then life might just be boring and I might not like it too much. So I think I am going to spin in circles with crazy busy and just call it dancing.